


Temporal Mechanics

by gammacorvi



Series: Of Friendship and Wormholes [4]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 10:15:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7504456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gammacorvi/pseuds/gammacorvi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"My Captain, Spock's counterpart says, had the most annoying habit of ordering me to stay behind on the ship and face the most dire situations on his own. Whether this was because he feared for my safety or the safety of the ship, or whether he genuinely preferred to deal with a given circumstance on his own never became clear to me. Invariably he would get himself into trouble and need to be saved, sometimes at great cost. I trust you have already observed the same propensity toward personal disaster in your own Captain?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Into the Wormhole

**Author's Note:**

> After the death of Anton Yelchin I wanted to write a story that featured Pavel Chekov. This is what came of it.

“Where’s Chekhov?” the Captain asks.

The away team was nine members strong when they left, now there are only eight. Only one of them manages to meet the Captain's eyes.

David Cho, a bright young ensign who has been with the Enterprise all through the Khan affair, clears his throat.

“Sir, we assume that he is dead. We had to break off the search when the temporal rift started closing.”

“You assume.”

There is a dangerous edge in the Captain's voice. The away team is visibly uncomfortable. When he takes one step closer several of them recoil.

Spock casts a quick glance at the Captain. His crew is not as a general rule afraid of him, quite the contrary actually. Their reaction is unusual .

Ensign Cho is the only one who stands his ground.

“Yes, sir.”

“Lieutenant Baker, what do you have to say?”

Lieutenant Baker was in command of the away mission. Now he starts sputtering.

“Captain, the temporal rift was closing, we almost didn't make it back. We could have been stranded!”

“So you stranded Ensign Chekhov.”

“He’s bound to be dead, Captain. Believe me, there was nothing more we could do. The weather conditions… The predators…”

“There were predators?”

“Yes, Sir...I mean…”

The Captain doesn't let him finish the sentence but makes a dismissive gesture with his right hand.

“Mr. Spock, did the temporal rift close completely?”

“Yes, Captain. There is no trace left. The away team returned just in time.”

“Can we reopen it?”

“Unlikely, Captain, but there are options that we can explore.”

“Let’s get to it.”

“Captain,” Ensign Cho says, “When we entered the temporal rift the first time it took us right back to the Enterprise.”

The Captain looks at him, questioning.

“We had to turn around and reenter the rift before it took us to the other side.”

The Captain shakes his head.

“I can't see how that’s relevant right now.”

“Yes, Sir. I’m sorry, Sir. I just thought it was worth mentioning.”

The Captain and Spock exit the shuttle bay, leaving a shattered away team behind.

“This is not the way a temporal rift would behave,” Spock says.

“It doesn't mean anything, Spock. They probably made a mistake. Let's just concentrate on getting Chekhov back, okay?”

“Very well, Captain.”

~~~

They are 18 months into the 5-year-mission and the Captain has earned the reputation of never leaving a member of the crew behind. Ever.

There have been some close calls. The worst one that Spock remembers, was the away team that got stranded on a Y class planet, when a solar storm from the systems binary star interfered with the transporter. The environment was heating up, because a major seismic event had activated several volcanoes. Retrieval was deemed too dangerous.

In a last ditch effort the Captain had sent down Spock, in a shuttle, alone, because according to the Doctor, Spock would be the only one on board able to withstand the temperatures while wearing a protective suit.

As it turned out the situation had not been quite as dire as expected. The away team was treated for burns and Spock had been just fine. Spock is aware, though, that had the Enterprise been commanded by another Captain the away team could have been abandoned, to not endanger any more lives.

This, at least is what Starfleet protocol recommends. Of course, the Captain has never been big on protocol.

~~~

“Does anyone have a solution for me?”

“Captain, there is no known way of breaching the space-time continuum. Applying concentrated converging tachyon beams from three different sources is considered a possibility, although this is just theory. We would need three constitution class starships to achieve this, but the nearest ones are the Farragut and the Nightingale, respectively three weeks and two months away at maximum warp.”

Here is the deal: The Farragut is currently patrolling the perimeter of the Neutral Zone. Relations with both the Klingons and the Romulans are strained. The Nightingale, a medical research and supply vessel is delivering medical supplies to several outlying colonies and medical aid to a space station that has been hit by an unknown virus.

Spock sees the realization of the impossibility to withdraw either ship from its mission hit the Captain. Then his gaze takes on that focused, stubborn quality that means he is plotting something and failure is not an option.

Spock, forever more pragmatic than his friend, does his best to give solutions where no solutions should be possible.

Now the Captain looks at him, pleading with Spock to give him _something_ to work with, without so many words.

The problem is that little is known about space-time anomalies. Few of them have been encountered and only a handful properly scanned and documented. Their scientific methods and instruments, logical thinking in itself, designed to occupy a specific place in the space-time continuum, are imperfectly suited to understand the nature of anomalies of time and space. Spock currently regards space-time as a vast river, its water full of swirls and eddies, the flow faster in the middle of the stream than towards the banks, tributaries branching out like branches on a tree. Who knows where it will end, in what vast ocean of time. This however is just an imperfect theory, a picture in Spock's mind and the truth remains unseen. His contemplations are complicated by his conviction that their own timeline is nothing more than a recent off-branch of a wider stream, created when his counterpart opened a black hole and ripped open space and time.

Ah, yes, his counterpart, good-naturedly meddling in the affairs of the universe, ran afoul of the forces of revenge and evil personified in one man and altered all of their destinies. Whether for the better or worse, senselessly or for a specific purpose remains to be seen.

Red matter.

An artificial substance that Spock's counterpart used to insert into a supernova. And action that ripped apart the fabric of space and time. A volatile substance, which manufacture is currently outlawed. A few drops have been preserved in the Katric Ark on New Vulcan, something that is technically not approved under Federation law and only known to a few.

Red matter will not help them recover Chekhov. The Enterprise's science lab however holds a small container of decalithium isotopes. The very substance that is used to manufacture red matter. Spock's own research has shown that decalithium has a barely measurable impact on the flow of time. Spock wonders what will happen if the decalithium isotopes are brought into contact with the region of space still weakened by a recent temporal rift.

Spock and Scotty run the computer simulations.

“No, Captain,” Sulu explains, “The rift doesn't need to have a specific size for the shuttle to go through. Actually, any size will do. Even an opening the size of a pinprick will pull us through.”

“The shuttle will not be harmed,” Spock adds, when he sees the Captain's face.

They deploy the decalithium. But by the time the rift reopens, 12 hours later, Spock is not sure if the decalithium actually had any effect or if this region of space is prone to close and reopen the rift at random intervals.

~~~

“You and me, Sulu,” the Captain says.

“Yes, sir.”

“Captain,” Spock interjects, “May I point out that neither you nor Lieutenant Sulu have any experience in applied temporal mechanics. This rift will likely close again and you will find yourselves stranded on the other side. In that case it would be advisable to take advantage of my expertise… “

“I need you to take care of the ship, Spock.”

“Lieutenant Sulu is singularly qualified to take care of the ship as he has demonstrated on multiple occasions. My specific set of skills is best employed at your side.”

_My Captain, Spock's counterpart says, had the most annoying habit of ordering me to stay behind on the ship and face the most dire situations on his own. Whether this was because he feared for my safety or the safety of the ship, or whether he genuinely preferred to deal with a given circumstance on his own never became clear to me. Invariably he would get himself into trouble and need to be saved, sometimes at great cost. I trust you have already observed the same propensity toward personal disaster in your own Captain?_

_“_ Mr. Spock… “

“Captain.”

Silence.

“Mr. Sulu, you have the conn.”

“Aye,sir.”

~~~

A chill wind blows across the mountainside.

A standard issue emergency shelter has been left behind by the original away team, anchored in a sheltered location. There is a vista into a large, forested river valley, tucked between high mountain ranges.

Spock checks the tricorder.

Chekhov got lost somewhere in that river valley. That there are alligator-like creatures living in shallow ponds beside the river is just an unconfirmed rumor.

“We should have gone out here the first time, instead of sending your scientists. You know how I love exploring.”

If the Captain had followed his inclination for exploration, most of the senior bridge crew would have gone on the away mission. This is not recommended by Starfleet regulation. But Spock is inclined to indulge the Captain next time. His observations show, that if the Captain is involved, away missions tend to be more dangerous. But because of his superior set of skills in facing said situations, they also require less intervention from those left on the ship. All provided that he has Spock at his side, of course.

“I do, Captain.”

“Any life sign readings?”

“Plenty of life signs, Captain, most of them indeterminate. No human life signs.”

The Captain's face shows clearly that he is tempted to bring the Enterprise with her superior scanners through the rift. Of course, that is out of the question.

The temporal rift closes again on their second day on the planet. They spend three weeks exploring the river valley by foot and with the help of the shuttle, from the glaciers that feed the river, to the delta that empties into the sea. There is no sign of Chekhov. Not a single trace.

~~~

“We have to face the possibility that the temporal rift led us to a different time in the planet's history. There is no guarantee that the reopened rift even led us to the same timeline,” says Spock.

“That had occurred to me. But then what about the shelter? If it’s here doesn't that mean we’re still in the same timeline?”

“This location might have been visited simultaneously by the crew of an Enterprise from another timeline or another universe altogether.”

Temporal Mechanics. So much fun.

The Captain is worn out and gloomy. When Spock suggests a game of chess - it is well after dusk - he explodes:

“Hell, Spock, don't you have any feelings at all? We figure out that Chekhov is lost in time, we’ll probably never be able to recover him. He’s all alone, probably scared to death and you want to play chess!”

He has gotten up, a replicated sandwich half eaten on his plate, pacing restlessly. He has lost weight. Spock thinks that he might have forgotten that not just Chekhov is lost in time and space - so are they. They currently have no possibility to get back to the Enterprise.

The Captain leaves the shelter and it is probably fortunate that sliding doors cannot be slammed.

Spock takes the opportunity to meditate and regain his balance. The last three weeks have been rewarding in terms of scientific research but deeply frustrating considering their search mission.

Chekhov’s bright face follows him into the meditations. The enthusiasm, the pronounced Russian accent, the genius at work - Spock does not want to believe that they will never recover him. He was there at the battle of Vulcan, held his ground when the Enterprise was caught in Earth’s gravity well and almost crashed. Spock knows Chekhov saved both the Captain's and Scotty's life. He is part of the family. It is unthinkable to let go of him.

The Captain's assumption, that Spock does not have any feelings in the matter, hurts. They are friends. After all this time Spock thought the Captain knew him better.

~~~

Darkness falls, and when the Captain does not return Spock goes outside. Winter is coming and the nights are cold. A brisk wind is blowing down from the glacier.

Spock listens, but there is only the howling of the wind.

It takes him two hours to locate the Captain and by that time it is dark. Spock feels the night chill into his Vulcan bones although he is wearing a thermal uniform jacket.

They have worn a path a few hundred feet up the mountain to an outcrop that has served them as a lookout. Something strange has sprung up on the mountain side. In the bright light of the planet's moons Spock can see sparkling, crystalline structures, not quite man high.

“Spock!”

The Captain’s voice is almost ripped away by the wind. He is crouched, uncomfortably, inside one of the structures and when Spock touches it, it is cold, like ice. The Captain seems to be trapped.

“Spock, I’m so glad to see you! Can you get me out of here?”

The frustration about Spock’s assumed lack of feelings seems to be over. There is that to be grateful for.

Spock, initially is not worried. But soon it becomes clear that the crystalline structures, plantlike as they appear, are hard as rock. Unyielding, and impenetrable. The tricorder readings give mixed results and all Spock is sure about is that he can hack his way into one of these structures as little as he can hack his way through transparent aluminum. Spock gets a phaser and a laser cutter from the shelter, but none of them have any effect.

“Shit, Spock, I’m cold…”

Spock kneels in front of the structure that separates them, his hand on the cold crystal and is suddenly not anymore on an uninhabited planet, lost in an alternate universe, but back on the Enterprise, kneeling before a door of transparent aluminum.

He snaps out of it a moment later and sees the Captain staring at him, wide-eyed.

A new star blinks in the sky and Spock’s tricorder beeps a notification. The temporal rift has reopened.

~~~

“You have to leave.”

The Captain has been trapped in the structure for two days and three nights. He suffers from hypothermia and dehydration. Spock is unsure how long he can make it. He is strong, so maybe another night. But it is getting colder every day and Spock knows that time is running out.

“Mr. Spock, this is an order!”

The temporal rift is closing, rapidly. Spock thinks that if the Enterprise were still on the other side there would have been a shuttle or some form of communication, but there is nothing.

Spock has never openly defied an order before. But there is a first time for everything.

The Captain is begging, warning Spock that when he dies, Spock will be left here all alone.

Spock has been doing calculations on the tricorder when the solution finally becomes clear. It is like a ray of sunshine on a rainy day.

The Captain has been quiet for a while, half lying, half crouched against the inside wall of the structure, arms wrapped around himself. Now that Spock puts down the tricorder he looks up.

“Captain,” Spock says, “I have reason to believe that this barrier, which seems to be part of a larger, plant-like structure will wither and die in just under three weeks.”

The Captain tries to laugh but it doesn’t come out well.

“You know, Spock,” he whispers, “I’m never going to forgive you for this. I can't have a First Officer who doesn’t follow my orders. You’re fired.”

Spock gives no indication that he has heard, even with his supposedly superior Vulcan hearing. His eyes return to the screen of the tricorder and his fingers rapidly scroll through the available data.

"Of course," he says, "we don't have three weeks. In fact I estimate that we will have to breach this barrier in approximately three hours to ensure your continued survival."

He continues working on the tricorder for several minutes until, at last, he gets up, holding the tricorder low, pointed toward the structure.

“I advise you to roll up and protect your head with your hands,” he says.

The Captain does as he is told. There is a high-pitched, whining sound and then heavy chunks rain down around him, bruising his back and arms.

Spock makes an indeterminate sound and helps him up. He produces a bottle of water and holds it against his lips.

The Captain drinks and then fists his hand into Spock’s thermal jacket and leans his forehead against his friend’s shoulder. Spock, gracefully, does not protest.

“Damn, Spock, I never thought this would work,” he says, his voice barely audible.

Spock drapes a blanket around his shoulders.

“Think I’m gonna keep you on as my First Officer after all.”

“You will have my resignation as soon as we are back on the Enterprise. I am well aware that the trust between us has been breached. As you said, you cannot employ a First Officer who doesn’t follow your orders.”

The Captain tries to get up. But his legs feel like wet spaghetti. Spock prevents him from falling. The Captain clings to him and Spock adjusts his arm and grips him firmly around the waist.

“Don’t feel like fighting with you,” the Captain slurs and Spock has to strain to hear him.

“It is wise,” he says.

They are only halfway down the path when the Captain’s strength gives out and Spock has to carry him, slung across his shoulders, the rest of the way.

Back in the shelter it is warm. Spock undresses his Captain quickly and efficiently and wraps him in a heated blanket.

He gives him to drink and treats him with several hyposprays. Soon the shivering stops, the Captain’s breathing evens out and he relaxes into the blanket.

Spock expects him to sleep, but he merely dozes off for an hour until he is awake again. Staring off into space.

“What a mess,” he says softly, his voice considerably stronger than it was before. “I hope Chekhov has more sense than I did, to sit on the ground and get trapped.”

He shivers again.

“God, Spock, that kid is so smart and resourceful. I bet he’s still out there. We just have to find him.”

“We will not abandon him,” Spock says.

The Captain looks at him.

“As I could not abandon you. How is it that you ordered me to leave you behind, yet I have never seen you abandon anyone or anything?”

“The time will come,” the Captain says and Spock is startled. The Captain cannot possibly know what Spock's counterpart told him about the Admiral’s end.

“You expect me to abandon you?”

“I have always known that I will die alone.”

“Then now is apparently not the time,” Spock says, sensibly.

He wonders if he should say what is in his heart. He is inclined not to but knows that life has a way to turn around and make you regret the things you omitted.

“If you ever find yourself in the situation that you just described, or in any other circumstance that separates us, know that I will come for you.”

The Captain turns slowly onto his side, facing him.

“I’ve never had a friend like you. Maybe with the exception of Bones, but that's a little different.”

“Yes,” Spock says.

“Hey, I tell you, Bones is as good as gold.”

“I will take your word for it.”

“I will not accept your resignation.”

“It is a matter of trust, Captain.”

“I trust you. I trust you to call me out on my bullshit. I trust you not to follow an order that you know is wrong because your Captain can’t think straight.”

He frees his hand from the blanket and lifts it in the Ta’al.

“My Vulcan is a bit rusty. What is the word for friend again?”

“T’hy’la.”

The Captain obviously expects him to touch his hand as they did once before under other circumstances. It is a gesture not customary among Vulcans and carries with it an affinity that Spock knows the Captain is not aware of. Nevertheless he meets the Captain’s hand with his own, their palms touching.

“Spock, my t’hy’la,” the Captain says, “Thank you for saving my life, again.”

Spock feels a great upsurge of emotion. His throat grows tight and he knows he would not be able to speak. The word t’hy’la denotes so much more than the human word friend. There are layers upon layers of friendship, loyalty, trust and love woven into it that reach back, deep into Vulcan’s mythological past. A world that is no more. And yet some of it has survived in the things that go from heart to heart.

Spock retrieves his hand and sees the Captain’s eyes droop. Soon he is asleep.

~~~

Two days after Spock retrieves his Captain from what they now call the ‘ice flowers’, winter arrives at their mountainside location. It starts to snow and while Spock still considers if the Captain is well enough and if it would be advisable to move into the valley, several feet have accumulated. By that time he thinks it might be less dangerous to remain, than to move. They are not exactly in a survival situation. The standard issue emergency shelter is durable under almost any condition. While it is a little cramped for an away team of nine, there is plenty of room for two people to not get on each others nerves. There are three bedrooms, a small science lab with an attached hydroponics section. Two replicators and a small matter/antimatter generator provide all necessities of life. They can make it on this planet indefinitely, if need be. And maybe Chekhov, in another timeline, will too.

~~~

“Are you cold?”

“I am comfortable, Captain.”

“You don’t look comfortable.”

“I can assure you that I am fine. The temperature is exactly the same as on the Enterprise.”

“Then why are you wearing thermal underwear?”

Spock looks up. Maybe the accommodations can be considered a bit cramped, after all, if his Captain knows what kind of underwear his First Officer is wearing.

“I always wear thermal underwear,” he says, trying to preserve his dignity as well as possible.

The Captain mulls that over.

“You know, Spock, I think you’re not comfortable on the Enterprise, either. What is it with you Vulcans? I thought the desert gets extremely cold at night. Shouldn’t you be used to a wide range of temperatures?”

The Captain, of course, is right. Spock is uncomfortable with the human temperature range. Always has been so. He is aware that he feels cold more keenly than a full Vulcan, or a human. It is one of a number of things that he has learned to live with.

“I am half-human, Captain. My discomfort is possibly due to my hybrid physiology.”

The Captain always gets uncomfortable when Spock’s half-human, half-Vulcan heritage is brought up. In particular he seems to have a problem with the word ‘hybrid’. Spock does not know why. Now he is silent for a long time.

“I’m sorry, Spock. I didn’t mean any offence. I just usually think of you as Vulcan, and…”

He stops, looks mortified and closes his mouth.

“Captain,” Spock says, “It seems that you expect a sensibility on my side toward the subject of my mixed heritage. I assure you that I am not offended in any way and that this sensibility does not exist.”

“You can’t tell me…”

Spock waits.

“Jeez, Spock, people are always making remarks about you. He’s half this and half that. It’s because he’s a hybrid. It’s because he’s not even human. It;s because he’s not  full Vulcan. I’ve heard it from your own people, too. And I saw your face when I called you a half-breed. Remember?”

Of course, Spock remembers.

He turns around and faces his Captain.

“Slurs like this are to be expected. Every race we have encountered in the Galaxy displays a certain degree of racial superiority and looks down on those they regard as less. Even more so for those of us of mixed heritage. It is the opinion of a minority, though. I have no particular sensitivity toward the subject.”

“Then why…?”

_“Mind your own business, Mr. Spock, I'm sick of your half-breed interference. Do you hear?”_

To hear his Captain say those words had been difficult. It was fortunate that he had realized, soon, that the Captain had not been himself in that moment.

“I urge you to forget the incident you are referring to, as I have done. You were not at fault.”

“You trusted me.”

“I know the limitations of putting trust in a human,” Spock says, drily.

The Captain laughs.

Then he gets up and cranks up the temperature another three degrees and peels of his uniform jacket. Spock suppresses a sigh.

“I assure you, Captain, it is of no consequence…”

“It is of consequence to me,” the Captain says with a tone that means that this conversation is over.

Spock turns back to his work.

~~~

Spock has reviewed the literature on temporal mechanics. It is full of theories and short on fact. It is, in fact, so short on fact that there are wildly differing theories about the true nature of the space-time continuum.

There are those who regard the Universe as a predetermined entity. One is free in one's actions but no matter which course one chooses, the outcome will always be the same. The future is already written. In that case Chekhov is already saved - or lost - no matter what they do.

Spock is quite sure that the rift they have encountered is of a temporal nature. That means they have been displaced in time. But since the planet occupies coordinates where no planet is to be found in their own time, one has to assume that the rift also is a doorway to an alternate universe. It essentially means that not only are they lost in time, they are also lost in one of any number of parallel universes.

The rift they encountered seems to be so unstable that it opens up into a new universe every time it reappears - which means that they themselves and Chekhov, are nothing more than specks of dust, afloat in an infinite multiverse, trying to reach shore.

Or, as the Captain put it:

“We are so fucked…”

And if they try to find their way back to their own universe and their own Enterprise they just might make things worse - traveling down one, and then another one, and another one of endless tributaries in the flow of time. Likely getting farther away from Chekhov, and the Enterprise with every action that they take.

But if there really are infinite parallel universes out there, there are also infinite possibilities how their story will play out in the end. In one universe Chekhov will be found, in another one he will remain lost, in yet another one - who knows…

Spock has two theories that are as yet untested. He thinks it will be possible, with the right equipment, to determine their Quantum signature. A subatomic resonance of matter, tracing back to the very beginnings of time, consistent in one universe but different in any other.

The other theory is, that if Spock is able to determine the quantum signature of any given object or living being in the multiverse, he might also be able, in conjunction with other data, like a person’s DNA, to determine that object’s or being’s exact position in the multiverse. He is just looking for the right equation.

He is working on the latter problem, oblivious that the Captain is watching him.

“You know,” the Captain says, “The whole temporal mechanics thing gives me a headache, but I’m pretty sure you made a mistake here.”

He points the problem out on Spock’s PADD.

Spock almost scoffs.

Jim is a Starship Captain. He is is very bright. Even for a Captain. He has a superior grasp of warp mechanics. But he is not a scientist. And this is Temporal Quantum Mechanics.

“I know, Spock.” the Captain says, “But even you can make a mistake.”

Spock checks his calculations and discovers that the Captain is right. He corrects the equation only to have the Captain show him a simpler, more elegant solution.

He looks up.

“You have been keeping things from me.”

“It’s just something Chekhov and I have been fiddling with.”

Spock cannot believe that it is that simple. He has read the Captain’s file. There are those who have called him a genius. But this…

He stares at his friend.

“Oh, come on, Spock. This was not meant as criticism. I think I know where you’re going with this. Let me help.”

They combine their resources and spend days immersed in quantum equations while the wind howls and the snow piles up on the mountains.

It is a new experience for Spock, who, despite his long standing relationship with Nyota, is of a solitary nature. He does not strive to be understood. And his own understanding of the woman that he loves is, as he well knows, imperfect.

He and the Captain are worlds apart and their relationship has been rife with misunderstandings. And yet, here the Captain follows him effortlessly into realms of pure mathematical thought. It is another way of communicating and Spock feels liberated.

~~~

The Captain has built a Quantum Scanner. From scratch. Spock helped, but he is not an engineer.

It is a crude instrument, likely not entirely accurate and Spock is working on calibrating it as best as possible.

The Captain, once the scanner is built, loses interest and leaves the fine-tuning and actual application up to Spock. Thirty feet of snow have accumulated and although they have air filters and the shelter is not in any danger to be crushed, he decides it’s time to dig them out. He melts a tunnel to the surface, which releases a torrent of water that the phaser has trouble vaporizing. He is then greeted by a stunning vista of white, mountains bathed in bluish and purplish shadows. The river valley is an expanse of snow.

He manages, with much hard work, to free the shuttle and they do a number of surveys, to add to the data that they already have.

By the time they are finished Spock thinks he is finally getting some reliable results from the quantum scanner.

“Your and mine quantum signature are consistent with each other and with the materials of the shelter. The quantum signature of the planetary environment is different.”

“That means we actually came back to the shelter _our_ away team built and not some away team from a parallel universe.”

“That is correct Captain,” Spock confirms, “Unfortunately we have a third quantum signature.”

The Captain feels another headache coming on.

“And that is?”

“The shuttle has a different signature. It is not from this universe and not from our own universe either. It is from somewhere else.”

“Damn,” the Captain exclaims. “That means it’s not our shuttle.”

“Exactly, Captain, it also, in all likelihood means…”

“It’s not our away team either…”

Then, it begs the question _whose_ Chekhov was lost? And where is _their_ away team?

“How is that possible Spock?” the Captain asks, rubbing his head.

“I do not know. The instability might lie in the temporal rift itself. It is possible that it is a doorway not just to one but multiple universes. Essentially, every time you enter the rift the outcome could be different.”

“Spock, I’m not encouraged. I think we made a terrible mistake sending an away team through that rift in the first place. We had no idea what we were getting into…”

The Captain is not usually second guessing himself. It is probably a symptom of cabin fever. Spock distinctly remembers that there was great enthusiasm among the crew to explore the rift and he himself had calculated the risk to be within the accepted safety parameters. The Captain would never blame him, but Spock feels that he needs to reexamine the parameters upon which he bases his logic.He did this after the debacle in Niburu’s biggest volcano, but feels now that he has not been thorough enough. This is undoubtedly the Captain’s unhealthy influence.

_“Hey, Spock, that went pretty well! I mean, we saved the planet. And the geology department says it’s stable. We did a great job. You did a great job, you saved a world!”_

_“Captain, may I remind you that we let a primitive society see a spaceship. They have, subsequently, abandoned their religious beliefs and now worship a white goddess that ascends from the sea. The impact on their cultural development is…”_

_“Spock, the anthropologists LOVE it! No, seriously, no one has ever been able to study the impact of a spacefaring on a primitive society before. It’s a unique chance to learn something new. And anyway. Don’t tell me that you guys had no contact at all with us before First Contact. I mean I’ve heard all these stories from Admiral Archer and… Hey, why are you making a face like that?”_

~~~

Before they have any chance to discuss the matter at length or work more on the quantum equations that Spock thinks are their only chance to get out of what the Captain calls “this mess”, he goes outside to take some more readings on the shuttle. He becomes distracted by the setting sun and permits himself a few moments of contemplation. He hears the thunder of the avalanche but before he can react it is too late.

~~~

It takes Jim half a day to locate Spock in the vast field of snow that the avalanche created. He digs down with his phaser and a shovel, but when he reaches Spock the snow is hard packed around his body. So he does the rest of the digging with his bare hands. At the end they are bleeding but he can’t feel anything because they are so numb.

He drags Spock out of the hole and almost doesn’t make it because he is so heavy.

By that time Jim, of course, knows that it is too late. Spock is not breathing and there is no heartbeat. Just to make sure that the tricorder is doing it’s job he puts his ear against Spock’s chest and listens, but there is only silence.

He then drags Spock back to the shelter, which was just outside the area of the avalanche. The antigravity float is broken. Given Spock’s weight it is an almost impossible job, but he gets it done somehow.

In complete denial, he undresses Spock, rubs him dry and wraps him in several of the heated blankets. He then sits, beside the body of his First Officer; he does not know for how long.

It is several days later when the numbness that enveloped him gradually starts to recede and a brutal and all-encompassing grief surfaces.

Looking back on the seven days after Spock supposedly died, many years later, Jim has no clear recollection how he functioned or how he made it through. He will forever be grateful that nobody was there and nobody saw him.

~~~

Jim can’t stay.

There is no sign that winter is letting up but one way or the other he has to get out of here. He plans to take the shuttle. Somewhere in space, that's where he wants to be.

What exactly he’ll do out there he does not know. Something will come up. It always does. Maybe the temporal rift will reappear. Maybe he’ll figure out what happened to his Chekhov and his away team.

It will be a problem to get Spock’s body into the shuttle because the antigravity float is still broken and he doesn't feel very strong at the moment. But he’ll find a way. He can't leave Spock behind because he might never find this universe again and Spock needs to go home to the Enterprise for a proper burial. Also Bones will want to do an examination of the body.

Spock’s body is still wrapped in the heated blankets and when Jim approaches him he starts thinking that the whole thing is a bit weird. It is probably the first clear thought he has had all week.

Shouldn't the body have started decomposing by now? Maybe this is different for Vulcans than for humans.

Spock doesn't _look_ dead. He’s pale but there is a slight green flush to his cheeks. He looks asleep.

“Spock?” Jim asks, feeling stupid.

Of course there is no answer.

He touches Spock’s cheeks and his forehead. He feels warm, but of course he would be because of the blankets.

A strange conviction arises in Jim that Spock is still alive and that if Jim manages to wake him everything will be all right.

“Spock,” he says again, clapping his cheek lightly.

When there is no reaction he hits him in the face with his palm, then hits him twice more, harder.

Spock’s eyes snap open and he takes a deep breath.

Jim stumbles back, almost falls and regains his balance.

“Thank you, Captain,” Spock says. “It is fortunate that you know about the Healing Trance. I could have died if you hadn't woken me.”

~~~

The Captain sits on the other side of the room, arms folded across his chest and watches Spock drink a cup of broth.

He is calm and composed. Maybe a bit too composed, Spock thinks. It is not like the Captain.

“I thought you were dead,” he says.

Spock startles a bit.

“So you did not know about the Healing Trance?”

“Nope. Not a thing. You Vulcans are a secretive bunch. Is there anything else you want to tell me?”

“It is hardly my fault that you are not familiar with Vulcan physiology.”

Jim’s voice has a cold edge when he says:

“There is nothing about Vulcan physiology in the Federation database. I asked Bones and he said it was classified.”

“You should have asked me.”

“I did.”

Spock searches his memory but comes up blank. Maybe a side effect of the trance.

“You said it was of no consequence. That’s an expression you really like.”

“I apologize, Captain. I see now that I was in error and that the information is indeed relevant. I will have it forwarded to you as soon as we are back on the Enterprise.”

“Yes, you do that.”

There is an uncomfortable silence. Spock has the feeling that he missed something. The Captain is obviously angry but Spock is unsure why.

He looks around. The shelter is tidy, even the usual clutter that the Captain makes when he is working on something is absent.

The Captain scratches his beard.

“Yeah,” he says when Spock looks at him, “I let it grow. It was not as if anybody was looking at me.”

He gets up. His clothes are rumpled as if he had slept in them and there are dark shadows under his eyes. It is likely he had a hard time this past week. They are friends, after all, and the Captain, unaware of the ability of the Vulcan body to heal itself, thought he had died.

“Jim,” Spock says, and stretches out his hand.

The Captain's face seems to crumple.

“Gonna take a shower,” he mumbles. “Are you gonna be all right?”

“Yes, Jim.”

“You’re not suddenly gonna die on me again?”

“My condition is stable,” Spock says, and because somehow he has the feeling that his credibility has been called into question, he adds: “I give you my word”.

~~~

The Captain is gone for a while. When he comes back his face is flushed and his eyes red. He sees that Spock has peeled himself out of the blankets and gotten dressed and some of the strain goes out of his expression. He gets a 3D chessboard from the shelves and sets it up beside Spock.

“Are you okay?”

“I am well, Captain. It will, however take me a few days to regain my full strength.”

“You need anything?”

“I assure you, Captain… “

“I don't want your assurances, Spock,” the Captain says. “I just need you to tell me if you need something.”

“Your company and a game of chess will be sufficient.”

The Captain sets up the board. For a long time there is silence and only the occasional clicking sound of a chess piece being moved.

“Do you remember, Spock, this conversation we had with Uhura? In the K’normian ship? When we were on our way to get Khan?”

Spock could never forget.

“So, when I died, just… Spock, next time something happens can you just… remember… what you felt when you saw me dead? And assume that I feel the same thing?”

_34 minutes. That is how long he thought the Captain was dead._

The Captain turns a knight around and around between his fingers.

Spock is still not entirely sure what he did wrong. He is sure, however, that his Captain suffered significantly.

“I am here, Jim.” he says.

~~~

In the morning the Captain is bright eyed and bushy tailed. He fusses over Spock, gets out the quantum equations and says something about building a temporal transporter.

“A temporal transporter?”

Spock raises both eyebrows.

“Yeah, you know, to get people from one universe to the other.”

“Jim, you are talking about building a time machine.”

The Captain looks surprised.

“Sure. If you want to put it that way. It’ll work for time travel, too, of course.”

Genius or no genius, the Captain has probably lost his mind.

He is, however, not at all deterred by Spock's disbelief. He gets out his and Spock’s PADD and starts drawing increasingly complicated diagrams.

After four days of this, with barely some breaks for eating and sleeping he looks up at Spock in defeat.

“You know what, Spock, you’re probably right. I’ve been getting ahead of myself. We don't need a temporal transporter right now, we just need to figure out how to reopen the rift.”

“Once the rift is open we still have the problem of travelling back to the right universe.”

The Captain looks at his diagrams, frowning.

“We’ll worry about that when we get there.”

Meanwhile Spock has been working on exactly what the Captain proposes. To reopen the rift.

He watches the Captain throw down the PADD in frustration.

“Four days of work for shit,” he grumbles. “I’m going to take a nap.”

While the Captain dozes off in one of the bedrooms, Spock retrieves the PADD. He knows the Captain will never amount to anything as a scientist. He has the knowledge, even the geniality , but when it comes to scientific endeavour he displays a characteristic that is completely unlike him. He loses interest, gives up and goes on to something else.

Spock carefully copies all the Captain’s work to his own PADD and then synchronizes it with the shuttle's database just to make sure. He knows, left to the Captain the data will invariably get lost and when Spock requests a copy later it will be nowhere to be found. It has happened before.

~~~

The next item on the Captain's list is a temporal transponder, basically a device able to emit a concentrated tachyon beam. Neither Spock nor the Captain think it will actually be able to reopen the rift. The theory says you need at least three constitution class starship to achieve the desired effect. They don't have three starships. On the other side they have a region in space that already has a temporal fault line. It might need a lot less energy to reopen it. It is their only hope at the moment.

~~~

The Captain has mounted the temporal transponder on the underside of she shuttle. It is bigger than he hoped it would be, but he couldn't find a way around it.

Now he’s sitting in the pilot seat looking pale.

They’re not just missing Chekhov but a whole away team of nine crewmen.

“There is a possibility that they already found their way back,” Spock says.

The Captain shakes his head.

~~~

The temporal transponder works beyond their wildest dreams.

The mouth of the rift glows in brilliant colours. Purple and green shadows play over the Captain's face.

When they enter, the shuttle shudders for a moment, drifting rapidly through a swirling mist and then, with hardly any transition they are back where they came from.

“What the…” the Captain mutters. He checks their position. It is exactly the same as when they left, the planet floating above them.

“I don't know what happened, Spock… I'm gonna go in and try again.”

He starts to bring the shuttle about when Spock stops him.

“Let us check the quantum signature again.”

The Captain lands the shuttle back at the shelter but it is clear even before that, that this is not the same place. When they left the world was still deep in snow. Here it is late autumn. When they descend they see the faint shapes of the ice flowers sparkling in the afternoon sun. The Captain is visibly tense when they land. The shelter seems deserted. He jumps out of the shuttle and hastens inside, mindless of any danger that might be lurking. Spock follows slower, checking the quantum signature as he goes. When he enters the shelter he stops dead. Chekhov is laid out on the floor of the living space, partly covered by a blanket. The Captain hunkers beside him, rocking back and forth slowly, one hand covering his eyes the other splayed on the young man’s chest. He is crying, not making a sound.

Spock takes a deep breath and steps up to the body to scan for the quantum signature. When he is finished he puts a hand on the Captain's shoulder.

“Jim,” he says, softly.

There is the sound of running steps and then… Chekhov bursts into the room. He stands glued to the threshold. The Captain gets up, spinning around as if he expects to be attacked and Chekhov exclaims: “Keptin,” and launches himself into the Captain's arms.

“Pavel,” the Captain cries in disbelief and folds Chekhov into his arms like a long lost child.

And Spock has time to scan the quantum signature of the new arrival, too.


	2. Out of the Wormhole

**Of Friendship and Wormholes**

_By gammacorvi_

**_-Chapter 4-_ **

**_Temporal Mechanics, Part 2_ **

ooo

 

“He is indeed the Pavel Chekov from our universe,” Spock says, “the quantum signature is consistent with ours.”

Pavel beams and the Captain closes his eyes for a moment in relief. Then he puts his hand companionably on the ensigns shoulder and gives him an affectionate shake.

“What happened to your face?” he asks.

Pavel’s left eye is swollen shut, the skin purple and blue. His lip is split.

“It does not matter, Keptin,” he says happily.

There is something somber in the Captain's expression. They have Chekov back, but somewhere, in another universe, another Captain Kirk lost his crewman.

_When they exit the temporal rift and find themselves at the exact coordinates they had just left, the planet a sparkling marble floating above the shuttle, the first thing that pops into Pavel’s mind is, that they have entered into another parallel universe. So, Pavel thinks, they have three different Universes now. One in which the Enterprise found the temporal rift and the planet does not exist. Another universe with the planet in it, and then, another one, with the same planet again, but if Pavel is right, likely with subtle differences in its evolutionary history. Pavel plans to first scan the atmospheric composition. This might be enough to verify his theory. He turns toward the scientific console which is occupied by Lieutenant Chang, a senior scientist in Spock’s team._

_“Dammit, what happened?” exclaims Lieutenant Baker, who leads the away team. “We’re back where we started. Ensign Cho, verify our position.”_

_“Verified, Sir, we’re back where we started.”_

_“Bring us about, Ensign, we’re going back in.”_

_“No,” Pavel exclaims, “let me do the readings. Ve are not back vere we started. This is another alternate universe.”_

_“Bring us in, Ensign. The rift is closing, there is no time to lose.”_

_“Sir,” Pavel says, “The rift might take us to another universe again, not back to the Enterprise!”_

_Lieutenant Chang is blocking the console with his bulk._

_“Nonsense,” Lieutenant Baker says, “Ensign Cho…”_

_Pavel exclaims in alarm. He knows now that the rift does not lead to a simple wormhole that connects two universes. The exact nature of it needs to be determined, but Pavel thinks that they are dealing with a potentially volatile entity that might be able to take them and deposit them… anywhere. There are universes out there with conditions completely unlike their own. Some of them might be inimical to human life. In fact, this is something they should have considered before they ever left the Enterprise._

_“Take us in, Ensign Cho,” barks Lieutenant Baker, who sees that the rift is about to close on them and is terrified that they might get stranded on this side._

_Ensign Cho hesitates just that fraction of a moment too long. He has served with Pavel for several years now, and although they don’t know each other well, he has the greatest respect of the man who is a full 6 years younger than he is. In Ensigns Cho’s experience when Ensign Chekov speaks you had better listen. After all he managed the whole engineering section on the drop of a hat during the Khan Crisis and did a pretty good job. It was not his fault that the warp core got sabotaged and he dealt with the whole situation like a pro. Even Engineer Scott says so._

_If Pavel thinks there is imminent danger there probably is imminent danger and before Cho’s training kicks in and tells him that an order is to be followed, no matter what, the temporal rift collapses in on itself. A last, purple tendril glances off the shuttle’s port side and everyone gets a good shake._

_There is shocked silence._

_Then Lieutenant Baker peels himself out of his chair and rounds on Chekov, screaming insults._

_“You killed us, you imbecile. Just because you’re the Commander’s pet doesn’t give you the right to take command. You are responsible for our deaths!”_

_There is more, and the away team listens, open mouthed._

_Chekov makes desperate calming motions with his hands:_

_“Sir, if you vould just listen to me…” which incites Baker even further._

_It is true that Commander Spock is very fond of the bright, young Ensign and consults him frequently on matters that most of the other scientists on board have no hope of understanding. In Lieutenant Baker’s mind this situation is made even more outrageous by the fact that Pavel is not part of the scientific department. He’s the Navigator for Pete’s sake!_

_He is, of course, well aware, that Pavel Chekov’s way through Starfleet Academy had been a multidisciplinary one, which he finished in record time. Pavel has more scientific credentials to his name than Baker at the advanced age of 41. He is also psychologically stable and has shown sufficient leadership skill to be put on the command track. Very likely he will command his own starship one day._

_Lieutenant Gary Baker is deeply envious of the young man. Also, he worships the very ground that Commander Spock walks on and, although the Commander is always very respectful and unfailingly polite toward Baker, he would like to be treated with the easy familiarity of a fellow genius, the way Spock approaches Pavel._

_In fact, Pavel just saved all of them from certain death. The rift would have taken them and spit them out in a parallel universe so different from their own that matter doesn’t even exist. The Shuttle would have disintegrated instantly. This is exactly what happened to the shuttle and its crew in a universe not unlike their own._

_Of course, nobody will ever know._

_Lieutenant Baker has worked himself up so much, he loses control and punches Pavel in the face, twice._

_Pavel is so surprised, he doesn’t even lift his hands._

_They land back on the planet, which looks exactly the same._

_Pavel is thrown off for a moment when they locate the shelter, but by that time he has claimed the science console and studied the atmospheric composition of the planet. It is very similar to the planet that they just left, but not exactly the same. He makes a mental note to put together the quantum scanner, that he has been thinking about for a while, but never gotten around to. He’s sure the Captain will help. He enjoys tinkering with Quantum Mechanics._

_He tries to convey his observations to Lieutenant Baker, but the only one who seems to  listen is Ensign Cho. Lieutenant Baker simply has decided that this is the same planet they had left and the rest of the away team is swayed in his direction, although Pavel has irrefutable proof that it is not so._

_Since the rift has closed, there is nothing much that they can do, so on the next day the away team spreads out to do more in depth survey, while Ensign Cho is repairing the damage that the rift inflicted on the shuttle._

_The relationship between Pavel and the other members of the away team is so strained that he checks his equipment and decides to set out on his own. Since he has a communicator and is equipped with a locator he doesn’t foresee any problems in doing so._

_Pavel is young and strong and scientifically endlessly curious, so it might be excused that he wanders too far in his fascination and by nightfall finds himself at a tributary river in a remote side valley._

_This is not a problem for him. He can camp out here in the wilderness for several days if he wishes, but when he tries to call in, he discovers he has lost his communicator which also contains the locator._

_Damn. He curses his own stupidity in colourful Russian metaphors._

_On the next day he has to admit, that he is pretty lost, so he takes a break from walking and employs his navigational skill to locate the right direction. Soon afterwards he almost tumbles headfirst into one of the shallow pools that line the riverbank._

_They visited those same pools in the alternate universe and spend several hours bathing and cooling off, although Lieutenant Baker thought they were the perfect hiding spot for alligators, which apparently never developed on that world._

_Pavel now discovers the first significant difference between the two similar universes when he wades into the pool and is almost eaten._

_It is a huge specimen, very similar to an earth alligator in appearance. Thankfully Pavel’s phaser is fully functional. He manages to retreat to the bank, the alligator following him and when it is not deterred by the stun setting, he kills it._

_It is his scientific curiosity that drives him to perform an autopsy of the dead animal and after having studied the physiology and general layout of the organ’s he gets some strange readings on the tricorder, decides to cut open the beast’s stomach and finds...himself._

_Pavel, shocked but also fascinated, builds a travois and drags the body back to the shelter. He has to camp out again the following night and is woken by the beep of the tricorder. A notification tells him that the rift has reopened. Deeply excited he takes some readings and discovers that the rift is currently so big he can locate it as a multicoloured oblong star in the night sky._

_One hour later his world breaks apart when he sees the streak of their shuttle against the early morning sky. He has been left behind._

The Captain’s listens to this whole story with an increasingly thunderous expression.

“I am so, sorry, Keptin,” Pavel finishes his story. “I should never have…”

“Indeed,” Spock mumbles and exchanges a glance with the Ensign. His failings are obvious. And yet…

But the Captain just grips Pavels shoulders in his hands and looks his crewman in the eyes.

“Pavel,” he says. “The Enterprise will never leave you behind. I will never leave you behind. You know that, don’t you?”

His voice breaks a little on the last sentence.

“And I would never leave someone behind just for being stupid. By, God, then I would be dead by now. All the times Spock has stood by me…”

He exchanges a long, meaningful glance with his First Officer. Spock raises an eyebrow.

Pavel is overcome and on the verge of crying but the Captain claps him on the back, musses his hair and tells him that, thank God, he’s still alive and now they have to get going.

“Yes, Keptin,” Pavel says, swallowing his tears and looking at his Captain as if he walks on water.

ooo

They sit together on the outcrop, looking out over the River Valley. The wind carries a late summer warmth with it and the river valley sparkles with the orange and purple shades that the fall foliage has on this world. Behind them the ice flowers shimmer in the setting sun.

“How dangerous is it?” the Captain asks.

Pavel is drawing on the ground and Spock says:

“Ensign Chekov and I think that we might be dealing with a circular wormhole. Essentially an entity that connects any number of universes, although this number may be limited to only a few. Unfortunately at this point we have no means to do a survey of a wormhole. The ensign thinks that the wormhole has a sort of one-way traffic. That means that in order to get back to our starting point we would have to go full circle. “

“Like this,” Pavel nods, pointing to the crude drawing he made in the shallow layer of soil.

“The wormhole also seems to be able to access different times in the same universe, which may account for, that for us several months have passed while Ensign Chekov has only been here for a few days.”

“Two Enterprises and two planets,” the Captain mumbles.

“That we know of,” Spock confirms. There are very likely openings to other universes.”

“So where it takes us, is completely random.?”

“Possibly, Captain,” and “Of course, not, Keptin,” Spock and Pavel say at once.

They exchange a long glance and Pavel flushes in embarrassment. But when Spock gives him a nod he continues.

“Vormhole might be influenced by vere ve vish to go.Ve vish to go back to our ship, it will take us. Ve expect the worst…”

“...the worst will happen.”

The Captain thinks.

“I wanted to find you…”

“And you found me, Keptin.”

“This is, of course, only a theory,” Spock adds.

“Yup,” the Captain says, “Makes sense to me.”

There is, of course, nothing to indicate that wormholes are in any way sentient entities. Jim suspects that Spock only indulges Pavel. But you never know.

They bury the Pavel Chekov from the alternate universe on the outcrop, because their own Pavel approves. A short service is conducted and Jim tries to find the right words to honour the young man none of them have known. Pavel is remarkably composed, considering that he is probably the only person ever, to bury himself. When Jim expresses this on the way down to the shelter Pavel shrugs philosophically and answers, with the all encompassing mind of a genius, who is used to express the mysteries of the universe in mathematical equations:

“These things happen.”

ooo

The wormhole, this time, takes them right back to the Enterprise which really does nothing to refute Pavel’s theory, Jim thinks. Spock looks pleased while he checks the quantum signature of a nearby dust cloud, while Jim responds to the joyous greeting from Uhura:

“Where have you guys been? We’ve been worried to death! Are Spock and Pavel okay?”

He thinks she bursts into tears after he assures her that they are all fine, but he can’t be sure.

ooo

Their away team has made their way back safe and sound.

“Spock, what do you think about Lieutenant Baker?”

“He is an able scientist and quite dependable as such. Obviously he is unsuitable in an environment that is not governed by strict parameters. My assessment is that he panicked. I am at fault that I put him in this position. It was an error in judgement.”

“Great, now you’re saying it’s all your fault. You know what, Spock, it’s fucking annoying that you always take the weight of the world on your shoulders. When’s the next time you're gonna sacrifice yourself?”

Spock is only slightly taken aback. He opens his mouth to defend himself from the Captain’s unfair supposition. His track record during the last eighteen months has been flawless. Nobody can accuse him of having tried to sacrifice himself.

But then he closes his mouth without saying anything. He would like to avoid the Captain’s eyes, instead he stares at him, his gaze becoming unfocused. Of course, Jim notices.

Because Spock knows exactly what Jim is referring to.

He is referring to the incident, when Spock took an away team to investigate the Murasaki 312 Quasar. The shuttle had to land on Taurus II due to heavy interference from the Quasar and, yes, Spock was about to sacrifice himself to help the rest of the away team escape from the ensuing situation, when they were all saved by Nyota.

Undoubtedly, the Captain is also referring to Phaedus. Spock saved Lieutenant Hendorff’s and Lieutenant Sulu’s life, that is true. He also snuck behind enemy lines, alone, in what the Captain later called a ‘martyr operation’ to rescue them. It had been… reckless.

Not to mention Nibiru and Spock’s assumption that the Prime Directive was more important than his life.

Also, what did the Captain say when Spock found him dying in the warp core, sacrificing himself so the crew could live? 

_ It’s what you would have done. _

Ah, yes.

Of course, this is all in the past. Only Spock knows, as the Captain knows, that things have not changed.

“I have not forgotten neither Lieutenant Uhura's nor your own words on the subject. It is not my wish to inflict significant pain on either of you. I promise you that I will always take this into consideration.”

The Captain doesn't look reassured.

“Spock, your life is important to us.”

“I understand completely, Captain, I assure you, you have made your point.”

The Captain's expression says ‘whatever’.

“So, what do you recommend we do with Baker? ”

“Lieutenant Baker was well within protocol when he left Ensign Chekov behind. This is not the example you have set for the crew, however, it is not cause for disciplinary action, either. He believed the situation imminently dangerous and took action to secure the safety of the remaining members of the away team. Since he has a superior grasp of exobiology and meteorology, but his strength lies in the interpretation of data, I recommend that he be not sent on away missions in the future.”

“I don't agree, Spock. I’m going to have him transferred.”

“That is for you to decide, Captain.”

ooo

“What do you mean they are gone, Sulu?”

“They wanted to return to their own universe. Ensign Cho, I mean the one from the other universe, noticed that things were off after he saw you and Mr. Spock together. He says in his universe you are enemies and that Spock never forgave you for not saving Vulcan.”

That gives Jim a jolt. It is a secret guilt he carries around with him that he sees reflected in Sulu’s eyes.

“Apparently in their universe I died when I fell from Nero’s platform. So, no Sulu.”

Jim thinks about Sulu’s fall without a parachute, how he went after him, how his parachute failed, too, and that it was Chekov, brilliant, bright, wonderful Chekhov who saved their lives.

“Their Captain is apparently a selfish bastard and hard to get along with. Cho said they would be left behind if they didn't return. We gave them a shuttle.”

ooo

Things on the Enterprise are well. Sulu has kept a tight rein on things and Jim puts a commendation in his file.

Spock and Chekov amuse themselves by sending probes through the rift and are apparently getting a lot of fascinating data. Spock claims they will rewrite everything that is known about temporal mechanics.

Jim, meanwhile, has lost all interest in wormholes and anything that contains the word ‘quantum’ for the time being. He is longing for a fight. Preferably Klingons but in a pinch anything will do. Instead he convenes a meeting for the department heads to reevaluate the emergency supplies carried on the shuttles.

They have now two shuttles called Einstein, one with a quantum signature from another universe, while the Galileo was given to the other away team. Jim hardly thinks it will matter.

“Standard issue prefabricated emergency shelter,” he says, “worth it’s weight in gold. Durable, uncrushable, even under a mountain of snow. Replicators, obviously essential, but one of them needs to be big enough to replicate bigger parts. I had a hell of a time building the temporal transponder with all those itty bitty parts.”

Scotty shakes his head.

“With all due respect, Captain, it canna’ be done. If we make the second replicator bigger it wilna’ fit into the standard issue casing. If we dinna’ use the standard issue casing we will have to redesign the space behind the rear bulkhead, where the emergency supplies are stored. That means we will have to completely redesign the transporter that's next to it.”

He throws up his hands in a dramatic gesture and looks wide-eyed at Jim.

“Sure,” Jim says. “It was just an idea. We’ll have it done at Starbase 11 in six months. They have the necessary expertise.”

Scotty glares at him. Then starts tapping on his PADD.

“I can have it done for you in two weeks, five weeks for all the shuttles,” he says without looking up.

“I knew I could count on you, Scotty.”

Scotty grumbles something that nobody understands and glares at Keenser.

“Let's see…” Jim continues, “ The antigravity float was broken and the broken part was made out of sonodamite. Not replicable. We tried a redesign and nothing worked. After Commander Spock had the avalanche accident I had to haul him up the mountainside. I almost didn’t make it. What can I say… he nearly died."

He looks at the somber faces around the table. Nobody says a word. Jim looks at Spock.

Spock lifts an eyebrow.

In the end Pavel pipes up:

"Sonodamite is essential for antigravity devices. I have never heard of anything else that vill work."

"Come on, guys. Are you telling me sonodamite is the only possibility to construct an antigravity device?”

“At present, Captain,” Scotty confirms and shakes his head sadly.

“Then we have to include sonodamite in the emergency package.”

Scotty looks stricken.

“Starfleet will cut off my head for requisitioning it for emergency packaging. That stuff is expensive, Captain.”

“Maybe ve can use Russian solution,” Chekov says. “Ve use cryonetrium as essential component in levitation effect devices. Easily replicable.”

“Great,” Jim says. “Can you build us a prototype?”

Chekhov nods happily.

“Which brings us to medical supplies. Bones, there was no medical tricorder, no reference chart for any species but human and no bone regenerator. When did you last check the emergency supplies?”

Bones scoffs.

“Of course there’s a medical tricorder. It’s the green one. Not the blue one.”

“There was no green tricorder.”

Bones looks annoyed.

“All the reference data is in the tricorder.”

“Big help if it’s missing. So did you check it or not?”

Bones scrubs a hand over his face.

“I didn’t Jim. Protocol demands that all emergency supplies are tested and packed by the Starfleet contractor on Luna Space station. We have about 30 of those on board. When we use one it’s send to Luna for repacking and we use a new one. They’re standardized.”

He lifts a hand when Jim tries to answer.

“I get it, Jim, and I’m sorry you had to go through that. I’ll get right on it. I guess it’s no more standard issue emergency packs for us.”

ooo

After the meeting Bones takes Jim aside.

“Where have you been?”

“I’m right here. What are you talking about?”

“I have to do a medical examination. You know that.”

“Bones, I’m fine. I have other things to do.

“Dammit, Kid,” Bones suddenly explodes. “Do you know what was going on around here while you were gone? People were worried sick. I was worried sick. Especially after we discovered that the away team was from an alternate reality. _That_ freaked a lot of people out. We thought we’d never recover you. Jim, your crew was _mourning_.

“Oh, come on Bones, we were gone for three days.”

“A very long three days. And as I understand it you and the hobgoblin were down on that planet for several months.”

“Don’t call him that, Bones, okay?”

“Sorry, Jim. Now about Spock...,”

Jim looks up in alarm.

“Why, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, calm down, Jim, he’s as healthy as can be. But I was told he was in a major accident down there. There are some broken bones that have healed really well…”

Jim relaxes.

“...but what I don’t understand is that you accomplished this with hardly any medical equipment. You said there wasn’t even a bone regenerator.”

“Yeah, he went into something that he called the healing trance. Listen, Bones…”

“What!”

Bones voice drops to a whisper and he grabs Jim’s arm, casting a quick glance around if someone is listening to them.

“Did you say Healing Trance?”

“You heard me, Bones.”

“Good God, Jim, do you have any idea how the Vulcan’s guard information about their species? I have no in-depth information about their physiology at all. I’ve heard about the Healing Trance but nobody seems to know anything about it.”

Bones drags Jim back to sick bay, sits him down in his office and pours him a shot of Saurian Brandy.

“I want every detail you remember.”

ooo

“There was no heartbeat,” Jim says.

“What? How do you know that? There must have been a heartbeat. What did the tricorder say exactly?”

The tricorder is still back on said planet in the shelter and not recoverable. Jim tries to remember if he ever did any tricorder readings on Spock while he was in the trance, but there are a lot of things he doesn’t remember about that week.

“Bones,” he says, helplessly, “I just don’t know.”

Bones looks at him.

“How did you find Spock anyway? By your description he was several feet down when you found him. How did you pinpoint his location?”

Bone’s words bring back the panic and fear and he remembers scratching away the snow around Spock’s body, lifting the lifeless body out…

“Jim, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Bones. I guess I must have used the tricorder but I don’t remember. Everything was a bit crazy.”

Bones grumbles and makes a note.

“Are we done?”

Jim doesn’t feel like reliving any more tragedies and Bone’s gaze on him is heavy and inquiring.

“Jim…”

“Damn, what do you want me to say, Bones? You want me to break down crying? I thought Spock was dead for _a week_. It was hell. I felt like shit. Are we done?”

Bones gets up and closes the door so nobody can overhear them.

_Shit._

ooo

One psychological evaluation later Bones declares Jim fit for duty. His instinct tells him that the Captain needs a rest and counseling but he has to believe the data.

He was going to say something along the lines of:

_So, what is it with you and the hobgoblin lately? You’re all but attached at the hip._

But he lets it go.

Jim is rubbing his face with both hands.

He did not exactly deceive Bones on the psychological evaluation on purpose, it’s just that these tests are so ridiculously easy to manipulate. One day he has to talk to Bones about that, although Bones must know, right? Anyway, he doesn't need counselling, he just needs to be left alone.

He stands up and gets ready to leave.

“Woah, wait a minute, Jim, where do you think you’re going?”

Jim groans and sits back down.

“Bones, I swear, next time you…”

“Don’t worry, Jim, no more soul searching. Just one more question about Vulcan physiology since you are apparently the resident expert.”

Bones leans forward and looks at Jim expectantly.

“What do you know about something called the Pon Farr?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The 'sacrificing incidents' Spock is referring to are taken from:
> 
> 1\. Star Trek Volume 1 (IDW comic by Mike Johnson)
> 
> 2\. Star Trek Countdown to Darkness (IDW comic by Roberto Orci and Mike Johnson)
> 
> 3\. Star Trek Into Darkness (Movie)


End file.
